Everyone spends their life patiently waiting for different things. For some money beats everything, while for others romance is all they ever wish for. Some people long for contentment. Some people only ever wish to feel free. For me, what I always longed for, for as long as I can remember .. was magic. Magic in as many forms as possible. As a very unexcited yet curious and inquisitive child, it wasn’t until around the age of six that I first experience this ‘magic’. Before it was time to go on stage at the town halls annual variety performance, my heart pounded like a drum in my chest. The noise from the audience, the heat from the lights, the sheer anticipation. Once the music started and I hit the stage it was the most incredible feeling I’d ever had. For those few minutes, I was whoever I wanted to be. Before I knew it, it was over and I was almost counting down the moments to when I could perform again. I clung to those performances like glue for the next ten years or so. My fellow dancers seemed to get bored of this magic after a few years as I thought I would. But I never really grew out of it. When I eventually stopped dancing I felt like I’d lost that girl I was on stage, and I spent a long time trying to find her again. I wondered where and how I could experience magic like this again? Would I ever? In the meantime I discovered that there is a certain magic that exists in all of us. Walking through an airport age fourteen I decided to catch as many eyes as possible. And, once more I was anybody I wanted to be.. the confident girl flicking her hair or the mysterious, shy girl with only her eyes to play on. What I now realise is that all those years on stage, I was acting. Or maybe I was being the true version of myself? I can’t quite figure it out. Whatever it was, it was home to me – my happy place. As someone now pursuing a career in the entertainment industry, I know that to some it may seem a shallow or over ambitious path to choose. For me though, it all stems from that little girl who longed for nothing but magic. I laugh when I hear people say ”The struggle is real!” As a person who suffers with anxiety,I know that the struggle really can be very REAL indeed. The millions of thoughts that circulate in your head all at the same time. The overthinking. The lack of sleep. The desire to control everything. The worry. And from all of this – the sheer mental exhaustion. The lack of understanding from others can be difficult to comprehend, simply because you understand them so damn well. Having such a strong sense of peoples feelings can be a curse as well as a gift. I have learned that really everyone has struggles of their own. Everyone’s doing the best they can so you have to just let them get on with it. While my problems may be minor, I have put them to good use. Anxiety has caused me to become an expert in discipline, time management, analysis and so on, which isn’t a bad thing! Yet at the same time it can all affect relationships which is why I try to better myself every day. For my age I feel that my life experiences have taught me an abundance. Simple things, but simple things that are forgotten about in todays society. .I understand that everything happens for a reason, and I believe that everyone should live by this mantra. Try it for a week and I promise it will change your life! If someone is rude to you, you’ll put it down to them having a hard day. Or if you lose your job, you’ll know that it is to make way for a better opportunity. How? You’ll just know. Be kind. Be yourself. Be vulnerable, though not stupid. Have faith. Believe in your instincts. Follow your heart but bring your head along too. In the meantime, while my career path is a tough and competitive one with many ups and downs , the moments of magic it brings and the different possibilities I face make it so worthwhile. I am, piece by piece, finding that little girl on stage again. My advice to you? Find your magic. Whether it be your love of sport, performance, study, creating, writing - whatever it is- Focus on it. Live for it. But also, notice the magic that exists all around you. Watch people. Watch people interact with one another, their contentment. Witness the magic of life itself. Yasmin xx ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2 Comments
pascale lemonnier
8/14/2016 06:00:13 pm
very inspiring article. Thanks a million for sharing this! I love the way it's written and feel so much what you're talking about. thanks again
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Yasmin H
8/14/2016 07:28:22 pm
Thank you so much! Means a lot xx
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